I'm primarily going to use the example of pets in this post, but the same principles apply to children as well.
Throughout my life, I have encountered people who "love" pets. Some of these people rant and rave about how much they love their pets and even what measures they would take to defend them. Fair enough. I get that people have a deep emotional connection to an animal, for whatever reason.
What I don't get is how some of those same people who "love" their pets so much are also neglectful of their needs. They let them run all over the neighborhood, into traffic and into the wilderness with predators. They are indignant about neighbors who might be wary of their pets and their instincts or mischievousness, believing that their animals should have free access to the entire neighborhood - unimpeded - that means that livestock, other pets and humans (even children) should be subjected to any harm that is inflicted by their beloved pets, and if anyone even dares to protect their property, themselves or their children, those irresponsible pet owners are quick to make excuses or jump to the defense of the offending animal.
During the day (when the owners are at work, or evenings when their owners are playing) the pets are left on their own and not cared for properly. The anxiety and abandonment issues are real, but the owners "love" their pets. When it comes time for veterinary care, flea or worm treatments, baths/hygiene or sanitation matters, the owners are reluctant to love their pets enough to do what is necessary to solve the problems that inevitably come up as a result of pet ownership. Discipline or obedience training isn't even a consideration... because those things take time, work and (gasp) cost money.
There are even some animal lovers who don't even bother to have their pets neutered or spayed, get their shots or to legally register them.
If you love a pet or a child, you don't neglect them. You spend time doing things with them and take care of their needs. You don't abandon them when they become "inconvenient" with your life or when your living conditions change. You plan out their lives as you plan out your own. You take into account their future and how you are going to take care of them. For pets, it is a lifelong commitment of taking care of their needs. For children, it is a commitment of caring and nurturing, preparing them for adulthood so they can be productive and contributive citizens.
It is evident to me that many pet owners do not actually love their pets, but rather they just love the idea of having a pet. Sadly, this is the case for some parents as well.
